24 January 2008

Crazy Scheisse Lady Is Back

Some things are universal, such as retail predicting the seasons. For instance, Christmas. People start selling Christmas stuff before you can even get the Halloween candy out the door. By the time you have accepted the orange-black color scheme you are then bombarded with red-green and Burl Ives on repeat (can you tell Christmas is my nightmare?). Ok, so this probably doesn't happen in Saudi Arabia. But other than there and some other places, retail can usually be a good indicator of what's to come.

Now in Heidelberg, all the winter clothes are on sale. It's a weee bit warmer, but not so much that I would want to run around the block naked, or in der nackt (in the nude). But sure enough Spring is coming because all the, ahem, brightly colored chicken, flower and gnome ornaments are back on the shelves for purchase. These items are, in case you were wondering (you know you were!), are the "it" items for the home when it gets warm, or warm-er here. This is the birthplace of kitsch, baby.

Another thing I saw in the store windows were Halloween costumes. Now, when I saw this, I thought, "Wtf is going on here?" These folks know how to throw down. Turns out they have a Mardi Gras sort of thing here where for one day all hell breaks loose and women will run around in these costumes cutting off men's ties. Sounds crazy, yes, but it's true. So I am rounding up all of Hubbo's fugly ties on that day and sending him to work with a bag. He better come home with an empty bag or we will go down town and get them finished off.

The final sign of Spring coming, my FAVORITE sign, is the crazies have come back out. The scheisse lady on the #23 streetcar is back. I have mentioned her before. She gets on and just berates the streetcar driver, repeatedly saying "Scheisse!" all the way downtown. Oh, by the way, "Scheisse" means "Shit". She's about 75. So for about 10 minutes you're entertained/shocked/amused. It's really quite something. I must get a picture, but I am so scared she will go off on me.

I have to take my bike to the shop for a tune up. It's been sitting in the rack downstairs all winter and my brakes still squeal like you wouldn't believe. It sounds like I am wringing the neck of a small animal from miles away. Time to start riding again, or doing something. Spring is apparently coming!

2 comments:

Antevasin said...

You need to teach the Scheisse lady to knit! :=)

Sara said...

I have a Scheisse lady on the bus too! Except mine is called the Bonjour Lady, because she is absolutely certain that all foreigners speak French (yes, in a country full of foreign English teachers, she thinks I speak French!)

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